Poetry: Ajanta Paul

Ajanta Paul

Fertile grief

I did not cry

When my father died.

The tears would prove useful later, 

I decided, to water the deeds

Planted in his memory

As we overcome suffering

Through struggle,

According to his teaching.

***

Expression

Those bright flowers,

sun washed, rain tossed

have sprung from my grief

buried six feet below

who says sorrow

is barren, or not beautiful?

***

Foraging

Forage amidst the stubble 

of roots and stalks 

of old words in fallow fields

where poems yet bloom

in the barren heath.

Dig below the earth

Of the subconscious hearth

For tuber treasures of thought

Growing in the warm embrace

Of rejuvenating synapses.

Search amongst nettles,

Briars and brambles, shorn

Of hope, yet seething with fruition,

In this wilderness of wants

Where paradox haunts. 

***

Strong

I grew up in a thicket

with other saplings, 

warmed and drenched 

according to the season's whims,

danced in the breeze 

with my lissom siblings, 

slept under a gorgeous moon,

pulling her silver stole 

up to our snuggling chins.

Serene it was, and graceful, too.

Who was to know what was due

to happen in a year or two?

Tall and strapping, we were 

cut down in our prime 

and sent to a timber store

where we were fashioned into 

bamboo poles, and stacked together.

I had no idea how hard I was,

or what obduracy was packed

in my unknowing young sinews,

till that night of the fateful riot

when I was used to split

the skulls of innocent strangers,

shatter the dreams of teenagers,

and drive a wedge into togetherness. 

I had no idea how strong I was.

Strong enough to break others, 

strong enough to remain whole 

while my heart lay in tatters.

So strong that I wept to discover

the power that was in me.

Bred as I had been, in harmony,

I couldn't come to terms with my identity. 

***

Bio: Dr Ajanta Paul is a poet, short story writer and literary critic who is currently the Principal of Women’s Christian College, Kolkata. A Pushcart nominee, Ajanta has published in literary journals including Verse-Virtual, Setu, The Wild Word, Offcourse, Kavya Bharati, The Statesman and The Atticus Review. Her publications include The Elixir Maker and Other Stories, American Poetry: Colonial to Contemporary, From the Singing Bowl of the Soul: Fifty Poems, Beached Driftwood: Poems and Earth Elegies.

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Setu, June 2024