Showing posts with label Dah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dah. Show all posts

Fiction: ANA DIA

Dah

D. A. Helmer


Ana Dia disappeared from Beverly Hills Gateway neighborhood on a blistering day in June of last year. She was fourteen. After two days of failing to uncover clues over her sudden disappearance, and with the feeling that it was an abduction and not a runaway, the Los Angeles Police Department called the FBI.

    Ana Dia was with her fourteen-year-old school friend, Jenny Staple. They had spent the afternoon on Rodeo Drive enjoying their first week of summer break. Later, according to Staple, they took buses in different directions to their homes, and according to the FBI report, the last person to see Ana Dia was the neighborhood mailman at around five-fifteen-p.m. He saw her getting off the bus a few blocks from her house. They said hello to each other as she walked in the direction of the park instead of going to her house in the other direction. She then vanished.     

    It has been said that if a child is missing for more than thirty-six-hours then hope for finding them, or worse, for finding them alive, is slim to zero. The FBI worked the case day and night for two more weeks with nothing to show. The Feds at least wanted a body for the parents to bury, to have closure. They worked all the angles, especially the runaway angle. I thought they had worked that one too hard and were too desperate to prove themselves right––they emotionally crushed Ana’s parents with their clumsy arrogance and baseless insinuations. Finally, the Feds needed to let it go. Ana Dia didn’t run away. She had had an idyllic home life with loving parents and a caring extended family of aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents, along with a healthy social life. 

    For a parent to not know what happened to their child is the worst of living nightmares. Your child is there in the morning, then gone, vanished without a trace by the afternoon and your heart turns black, and, on most days, you are gasping for air as if some invisible punch to the gut had emptied you. On other days you can’t get out of bed because you have no soul left, no light. You lie there under the covers shivering, dying, turning to ice. When a child vanishes the chilling emptiness that lingers is a frozen hole that can never be filled––even if a body is recovered.

    The Ana Dia missing child flyers were glued, taped, and stapled by the thousands to every telephone pole, business window, train station, bus station, and airport, from Los Angeles to San Diego, up to San Francisco, and all cities, small and large, in between. UCLA had funded the printing and distribution of the flyers, the billboard slots, and the primetime radio and TV spots

––even though Ana’s parents were celebrated professors at UCLA there was no ransom being asked for by the abductors. 

    Friends of the Dia family flew to Nevada and Arizona and did the same plastering of flyers in the major cities in those areas. Other friends and family posted flyers in the desert areas: Anza Borrego, Joshua Tree, and the Sultan Sea, along with the entire San Bernardino Mountains.

    For nearly two weeks the news coverage was a constant flood of updates on Ana Dia’s disappearance, but the updates were empty gestures. There were no real updates, because there were no new developments. It was just the media’s looping sensationalism created to keep viewers attached to the tube. It was about program ratings disguised as heart-felt-caring from pseudo-somber news anchors and chatty talk-show hosts. They were good actors without dignity, with only that one word on their minds: Ratings. A high-profile missing child case becomes a media executive’s gold mine. The corporate advertising slots had tripled in cost during the Ana Dia coverage. The media chiefs had turned the disappearance into a contemptible carnival midway with the news anchors as their deplorable midway barkers. Even though it was a high-profile investigation there was too much Federal and local cop manpower on a probe that was going nowhere. After two weeks it was time to lighten the load. The FBI packed up and moved on to the next child abduction case, the LAPD returned to its regular city crime-busting, and the Ana Dia media coverage deflated to a sentence or two every few days. But there was still some lingering FBI presence, the two token agents, for the Dia family to contact anytime they had questions, even though the Fed’s answers were always the same, “We’re doing the best that we can. We’re always looking for new leads. If any new developments come up, we’ll contact you immediately.”

 

    Arnie Bender, Dave Wells, and I were having lunch at Abe’s Deli when Nick and Bridget Dia walked in. We recognized them from TV news shows they had appeared on and from the many newspaper photographs that appeared daily for about two weeks. The Dias were in their late-thirties. Nick Dia was dark-haired, lean, and handsome, with an intelligent face, and big, dark eyes. Bridget Dia was dark-haired, lean, and gorgeous, with an equally intelligent face, and big, dark-green eyes, like the color of avocado skin when the sunlight hits it. Both were renowned professors of astronomy. And it was obvious that the weight of their missing daughter had caused them to sag, bend, and break. When they walked over to our table, they held onto each other as if to stop the other from collapsing to their knees.

    “Mr. Stone. We apologize for interrupting your meal,” said Nick Dia, in a soft, quiet tone. “We were told by some people in your building that we could possibly find you here. The woman at the counter pointed you out.” He stopped talking, took a deep breath, and said, “We need your help.”

    Bridget Dia shook her head up and down a dozen times with quick snaps, like a puppeteer was in control of her. Nick Dia pulled her in tighter to his body. She stopped the head gesturing and stood still, and her dark green eyes overspilled with grief, while her beautiful face seemed to roll and fold into bundles of pain so thick and heavy that her skin looked like it would fall to the floor from the weight of it all. Her eyes welled with tears. Nick pulled her in even tighter. She buried her face in his shoulder for a few seconds, and then turned and looked at me.

    “My daughter is alive, Mr. Stone,” she whispered, with a wet, shaky voice, “I just know she is.

I–I just know it.” Her head snapped up and down again several times, while her eyes were closed. “Please, help us find her.” On that last line her eyes popped open, like window-shades had snapped up, making her eyes appear as dark scabs over something that was slowly dying.  

    “Friends of ours who used your service directed us to you,” added Nick. “They said that if anybody could find Ana, then it would be you, Mr. Stone.”

    His dark eyes penetrated mine like they had physically entered my head, as if to pull the whereabouts of Ana Dia out of my brain. Bridget shook her head rapidly, agreeing with Nick, while her jaw and lower lip trembled, as if she were trying to say something else, but nothing came.

    I was in the booth on the opposite side of my friends, who were sitting together. I got up and invited the Dias to sit with us as I crammed myself next to Arnie Bender and Dave Wells, which left part of my bottom hanging off the bench, and my legs stretched into the aisle. The three of us were paralyzed by the Dia’s immense desperation, by their contagious sorrow. We just stared at them the whole time, speechless, our expressions taking on the heartbreak of their loss. 

    The world is concrete-hard and razor-sharp, and filled with psychopaths and pedophiles who rise out of the skin of God’s dark side. They were once the purity of egg and sperm, only to evolve into heartless monsters feeding off the blood of others. And nothing shows more how hard and sharp the world is than parents who have had their children stolen from them.

    “Mr. and Mrs. Dia,” I said. “We, my associates and I, can’t do anything more for you than the FBI have already done. They were complete in their investigation, and …”

    “Ana’s alive, Mr. Stone!” snapped Bridget Dia. Her voice cut like a stropped blade and it felt like it had sliced my tongue to silence me. “The FBI believes that Ana is dead. Even without a body, they believe she is dead. That is not complete enough for us.”

    Her gorgeous face had taken on the severe expression of a mother that you don’t want to argue with. Nick Dia put his arm around her shoulder in an almost condescending manner, as if to stop her from talking. Bridget yanked her body away from him and threw his arm off her. Nick put his hands out in front of him, palms toward us, as if to gesture, okay, okay.

    “We have a copy of the FBI file regarding the investigation.” She slid a manila folder across the table. “At least the part that we are allowed to have.” She looked me square in the eyes and said, with a steady, firm voice,

    “Before you say no, please, read it.” She paused, caught her breath, and wiped tears from her eyes.   “We can’t stop here.” Said with a staccato deliver, “we just can’t.”

    Bridget Dia leaned across the table and came close enough to my face so that I could smell the mixture of heavy sweat and stale perfume, like she hadn’t taken a shower in a week. I could smell the fear of losing her daughter, of losing her mind, her marriage, her life.

   “This is our only hope, Mr. Stone,” she whispered, “it is our last card.”

    It has been estimated that about ninety percent of marriages disintegrate after losing a child to the hands of an abductor. From what I had observed the Dias were, as a couple, on their way to becoming a part of that hopelessly high percentage.   

    It was a hot day. Stifling even. The loud sunlight crashed through the deli window as if to execute this grieving woman. It hit the side of her face with a soundless slap, which made her skin bleach out, and her dark, green eyes became illusions, so far away and falling farther away. And, suddenly, all her wounds, sorrow, grief, anger, and resentment, had fallen into my life by the weight of her desperation.

 

    By the time my associates and I started to work on the Ana Dia case she had been missing for about three weeks. The three of us, along with Millie Bender working from the office as our phone-answering service and our research specialist, eight hours a day, scrutinized every page, every paragraph, every line, of the FBI report. Of all the people interviewed by the Feds, which included UCLA teachers, and students of both Dias, plus neighbors, gardeners, pool cleaners, window washers, and so on, it was the mailman that gave Arnie Bender a gut feeling that we needed to probe deeper into his statement. Because something felt incomplete.

    Brian Whitaker, a U.S. Mail carrier for twenty years, had told the Feds about a small white pickup truck, maybe used for landscaping, that had pulled in behind the bus while Ana Dia disembarked. The Feds brushed it off as normal activity in a neighborhood that had the presence of so many landscaping trucks. It was nothing unusual, said the Feds.  

    Whitaker, a short fifty-year-old, with a large forehead and thick, silver hair combed straight back, above dark, bushy eyebrows, was walking his route when Arnie Bender and I located him a block from Ana Dia’s house. His short stature was made animated by the bulbous size of his belly along with a ball-shaped face and chipmunk cheeks. His deep-blue eyes were set forward like enormous spotlights, and they were bright and alert. Though he carried a lot of body weight he was light-footed, like a gazelle, and strong, like an elephant. He seemed to walk on his tiptoes and had a distinctive bounce to his gate. His voice was on the falsetto side.

    “Was there anything else, some other detail that you missed telling the FBI?” asked Arnie, “Something about the truck? The tires, the bumpers, scratches or dents?”

    “Well. Um. I did notice a sign on the passenger door,” said Whitaker, while holding his chin between his right thumb and index finger, as his head bobbed up and down, agreeing with himself.

    “And the color of the sign, the background, the lettering?” I asked.

    “Black letters on a white background. Big, bold block-style letters. Nothing fancy,” answered Whitaker, “And after Ana got off the bus, like I had already said, she walked in the direction of the city park.”

    “What was written on the sign?” I asked.

    “From the sideways perspective that I had it was hard to make out.” Whitaker stopped talking, and his head tilted up slightly while his eyes lifted farther as if ready to roll into his head, “Ah. Um. The first two letters were KL, and the third, maybe an E or a B. Some smaller letters were underneath the larger ones that I couldn’t read.”

    “And the truck?” asked Arnie.

    “The truck?” asked Whitaker.

    “Yes. The truck. What did it do then?” replied Arnie.

    Whitaker had been putting mail into a drop box that was about thirty-feet behind the truck, which gave him enough time to observe the activity. Ana Dia stepped off the bus, looked back, saw Whitaker, waved, and said hi. She then walked in the opposite direction for about a hundred feet and turned into the park, which was a popular place with teenagers. The bus pulled away and the truck then drove down the street and turned into the park.

    “So, you didn’t get a look at the driver?” asked Arnie.

    “No. The back window was tinted. Maybe smokey grey. But I could see movement. Like when the driver had a clipboard in his hand, flipping the pages sort of fast, like he wasn’t reading them at all. He seemed to be looking through the windshield and not at the clipboard.”

   “And the Feds shrugged their shoulders and said, okay, we’ll keep that info in mind?” I asked.

   “Yeah. Something like that. It seemed incidental to them,” answered Whitaker. “They didn’t even write it down.” There was an obvious disappointment to his tone. His expression turned somber.

    “What were the agents like?” asked Arnie.

    “They were older. Probably older than me. And tired looking.”

    “Like they were biding their time until retirement?” I asked.

    “Yeah. Just like that,” answered Whitaker with a quick response, while his spotlight eyes widened and grew brighter, as if they had zeroed in on something suspicious.

    Arnie and I looked at each other and nodded with our lips pressed tightly together.

    “Oh.” Whitaker said quickly, “The bed of the truck was clean. Without garden debris. I thought that was strange. There were no tools anywhere.” He pressed his thin, almost non-existent lips together then nodded several times rapidly. His lips made a faint, pink line, as if a dash had been penciled in just above the chin.

    “What about a license plate number?” I asked.

    “It was too far away. My vision is not what it used to be,” replied Whitaker. “I really need to make an eye examination appointment. I should be wearing glasses for distant reading.”  

    Arnie and I thanked him, and as we walked away Whitaker called out, “Mr. Stone, Mr. Bender.” He ran toward us, as light as a gazelle, even with the added weight of his letter satchel. “One more thing.” he said, “There was a bumper sticker on the right-rear bumper with extra-large letters. It was torn across the top. But I did make out “SAN”, but the rest of the letters were missing, and below that it said, GUN CLUB.” 

    “Good job, Mr. Whitaker.” I said, “It could mean something.”

    “What color was the sticker?” Arnie asked.

    “Red. Deep red. With yellow letters. Bright yellow,” answered Whitaker.

    “Did you tell this to the Feds?” I asked.

    “No. It had slipped my mind,” replied Whitaker, as he shrugged his shoulders and said, “I don’t think it would have mattered to them anyway.”

 

    Later that day at the office with Arnie Bender, Millie Bender, and Dave Wells, we learned that Wells had interviewed a few professors at UCLA. According to Wells’ report, one of the professors, who was from San Luis Obispo, held a tight-crusted resentment toward Nick and Bridget Dia over the “way-too-much fanfare” the two Nobel prize winners had constantly received.

    Professor Jack Arnold, a tall, skinny, totally bald man of about forty-years old, with a head as round as a soccer ball and laced with bulging veins that seemed to be holding his skin to his skull, had stated,

    “It was too much.” Said with a baritone voice, “It was as if the rest of us didn’t count.”

    Jack Arnold was a nervous man with deep, almost hidden, dead-grey eyes and thin, dark eyebrows. Wells said that Arnold never looked at him when answering the questions.

    “They had everything,” continued Arnold, with heated resentment, “The big Academic prize, the movie-star looks, a house that I certainly couldn’t afford, in a neighborhood that I could only dream of living in, and a gorgeous daughter who was ahead of her class in everything she did.” He stopped, pulled a handkerchief from his back pocket, and wiped the sweat from his head, which made his eyebrows rise like the wind had blown them upward. “It doesn’t surprise me that Ana was abducted, not one bit.” Said with the conviction of a hateful man, “The two of them, and especially Nick, had gained a number of enemies on this campus.”

    “Were these enemies all professors like yourself?” asked Wells, “Would any of them have been so hateful, in the way that you are, that they could have committed this heinous crime?”

    “I have this feeling …” replied Arnold, with a quick snap of his tongue, “That you are indirectly asking me if I had anything to do with the abduction.” He wiped his head and the back of his neck with the handkerchief, while his hidden grey eyes appeared to come forward from his head, as if they were separate entities ready to attack.

    “I am making no assumptions,” replied Wells, “I’m just asking question. Looking for leads.”

    “In my opinion,” said Arnold, with the heartlessness of a dire enemy, “they got what they deserved.” Sweat poured down his face, dripped from his chin, and landed on his white dress shirt, “And I have no sympathy for them.”

    “That’s a damn harsh statement,” said Wells, with an edge of anger, “One would think that a man of your intelligence and education, and a father, would have at least a grain of compassion for the Dia family.”

    “If you’re looking for compassion, Mr. Wells, then go to a Buddhist temple. But from me you’ll get the truth.” Arnold wiped his head, neck, and face again, while his eyebrows fluttered, and then he asserted, “We are done here, Mr. Wells. And don’t harass me again, or there will be a lawsuit filed by my attorney.”

    Professor Jack Arnold walked away with the ticked-off body language of a school boy who had been disciplined by a teacher.

    Of the other professors that Wells had interviewed, none of them had expressed the resentment, anger, or loathing, that Professor Arnold had held. In fact, no one else on the campus––teachers, or clerical staff––had aligned with Professor Arnold’s one-sided perspective. All of them had had wide-open compassion for Nick and Bridget Dia. Though, one of the professors had led Wells to one of Nick’s students who was, as he put it, “angry and emotionally broken” over the low grade that she had received on her final. The student, twenty-one-year-old Sara Klein, from San Luis Obispo, had left for Cabo San Lucas a few days before the abduction for a two-week vacation with friends before starting summer school. She was unreachable.
    Back at the office, Millie Bender had been on the phone calling the gun clubs of the dozens of cities that began with letters SAN, including, Santa Maria, San Diego, Santa Cruz, San Luis Obispo, San Francisco, Santa Barbara, and so on, for information on their members. None of the clubs would comply without seeing a warrant. With the two indignant people from UCLA connected to Nick Dia, and both from San Luis Obispo (SLO), Arnie Bender, Wells, and I decided to head north to SLO after Millie Bender was able to get the color of the SLO gun club bumper sticker: Red with yellow letters. But before going there I got a court order for the gun club to turn over the club’s member list to us. On that list was Noah Klein, which we had connected to Sara Klein. We learned that Noah was her cousin.

    To cut a long story short, we discovered that Noah Klein was a thirty-year-old loner living in a trailer in the back country of San Luis Obispo. His occupation was garden maintenance. We drove out to his place to ask a few questions. The white pickup truck with the torn bumper sticker and tinted smokey-grey back window was parked in the dirt driveway. When he stepped out of the trailer-home to see who had pulled onto his property Noah Klein held a shotgun in which he had then pumped a round into the chamber. He was a short, woolly man with a small Afro of black hair and a full-face beard, so only his dark eyes peered out from what looked like a bushy ball. Standing there barefoot in ripped and dirty jeans, wearing a soiled white tank top, and with an extremely hairy-body, Noah Klein looked like a pet chimpanzee. Taking no chances, we had spread out so that Arnie Bender, Wells, and I, covered the front of the trailer from three sides. Arnie with his .38 Colt, Wells with his .357 Magnum, and me with my .38 Ruger. Without incident Noah Klein lowered the shotgun to the ground and raised his hands.

    Ana Dia was inside locked in a bedroom which had make-shift bars attached to the windows. She had been well taken care of and was in good physical condition. Ana had had everything that she needed to stay comfortable: food, clothes, bathroom access and so on, but she was emotionally traumatized. While Arnie Bender held Ana Dia in his arms she shook like a leaf on a stormy day, and she sobbed uncontrollably. She had been missing for four weeks. 

    Noah Klein was not a pedophile. He had not raped nor physically abused Ana Dia in any way. But he was emotionally unstable and had been under the care of a psychiatrist, who said that in his head Noah had an unnatural, intimate love affair with his cousin Sara––which caused him to act like he was protecting her. By the time the FBI, the local sheriffs had arrived, Noah Klein had confessed to us that his motive for the abduction was driven by his cousin’s staggering depression over her low grade, and he wanted Nick Dia to emotionally suffer, like Sara Klein had suffered. Sara knew nothing of Noah Klein’s plan for the abduction, and Noah had no idea how long he would have kept Ana, but that he was going to take her back to where he had abducted her. It was all crazy to him. He was confused and blathering while he kept apologizing to Ana Dia.

    I asked him how he did it, abducting her in the park. He said that he had had two rabbits on a leash. He also had one arm in a sling, faking an injury. He said that he had set himself up in her path so that she would see the rabbits and see him struggling with one arm to get the pets into his truck. Ana, of course, offered to help. When she bent down to place the rabbits inside on the floor of the truck, Noah gagged her with chloroform. He said the park was empty of people, no witnesses. It was just luck. He had had no real plan other than luck. Due to the fact, that Noah Klein had not physically harmed Ana Dia, he was handed a second-degree kidnapping charge with a reduced sentence of eight years in prison. While in a non-juried court, where he had pleaded guilty to all charges, Noah Klein apologized profusely and expressed a sincere remorse to the judge, and to Nick and Bridget Dia for the distress that he had caused them.

    To wrap it up, my associates and I had made sure that Postman Brian Whitaker was acknowledged for his keen sense of awareness and for his attention to detail. It was with his help that Ana Dia was found and returned to her parents. The Mayor of Los Angeles presented Mr. Whitaker with a key to the city along with the ten-thousand-dollar reward money from UCLA for helping Joe Stone and Associates in the recovery of Ana Dia. 

When asked by the press about their incomplete and failed investigation into the whereabouts of a missing child, the FBI had no comment. 

Book Review: Love’s Autobiography: The Ends Of Love

Love’s Autobiography: The Ends Of Love

Author: Duane Vorhees, Ph.D.

Pages: 64
Poems: 44
Year of Publication: 2018
ISBN-10: 9387883175
ISBN-13: 978-9387883178
Publisher: Hawakal Publishers

Book Reviewed by Dah


From the first poem, which states: “The ends of love /are but two”, to the last poem which declares, “Why, no, I’m not even bored!”, Duane Vorhees’ recent poetry book, LOVE’S AUTOBIOGRAPHY: THE ENDS OF LOVE, is a “whizdizzyingly” read.

Vorhees’ poetry does not fall short on impressive imagination or on the usage of clever creative language. It moves unrestrained and spirited throughout this collection, as in this example from the poem, “ANOTHER SPRING NIGHT IN FARMERSVILLE, OHO”:
 “farmers wait inside / their bones /
for the horizon to rise and beat the daylights out of the / sun”. And from the poem, “MY FINGERS”, he states: “My fingers have ridden through the forests of your hair / and slept on belly-gold prairies”.
But within this poetic language and lustful imagery we must not forget that the purpose of this collection is to make known, “The Many Loves of Duane Vorhees”, which is the subtitle of this poetry book that leads us to the chapter titles of these precious women: “Beth”, “Jenny”, and “Yeobo”.
Within the “Beth” chapter, Vorhees is not shy about his intention:
 “I’d draw sensuously back your damascene veil and let fly my shaft
deep into your bull’s-eye arabesque”, then he romantically coos: “We’ll dance naked, if you’re so inclined —
just billow our charms / wrap our sheets round yardarms entwined”.
And I particularly love this line:
“Visit me in my mushroom tower and I will come to you / down this deep dark ditch amid tinder black flowers / down to the buttercups and dew”.
Then Vorhees laments in the poem, “Without You Beth / My Life”:
“Beth: /
I miss you often. /
These paths unmapped and all my everythings nones”, only to move into this truth: “without you Beth my life's another burial ground”.
“I know why the sky sings the blues — for you, Jenny, for you”. This is the opening line of the first poem of the “Jenny” chapter, which is as rich in desire as love it self. A quick note here: My feeling about the interior design of this collection is, I would like to see a name chapter-page for each lover before the start of the poems, so that the reader doesn’t have to reference the table of contents to see whom the poet is yearning for.
With this said, the Jenny poems seem to have a bit more moisture to them than the Beth poems, as demonstrated in this line from the poem “Mushroom”:
“throughout your moist and fetid shadows”. And again in these lines from “Atoll”: “:melons full melons ripe /
:those raspberries (pink & wrinkled) delicate atop your / double-dip vanilla sundae /
:your slice of peach: your wedge of pie :your pyramid of / hot cobbler,
tart sweet juices oozing”.
And the poet’s aching continues its erotic playfulness in “Montana Hotel”:
“I do miss the slow flower of your eyes / But I’ll water I guess the garden of her yeses /
till I rest in the hollow of your thighs”.
Vorhees continues through this chapter by sharing many reflections on this particular lover, and this metaphor is exceptionally unique:
“Wrapped like a glove on the dresser. Lovely warm soft / leather. Carefully crafted. Turned nicely out. Waiting for / the proper hand”. And this seems like the climax to out-do all climaxes: “Imagine our bodies in Braille / finger tongues perusing / teasing out nuances / weighing every significance / We turn over / sheet after sheet / Each climax foreshadowed / we read ourselves to sleep”.
As we leave the Jenny poems and move into the final chapter, the Yeobo poems, we are witness to lovers who:
 “for many an hour /
pour their love / from lip to mouth like milk from a pitcher to a glass”, and who take “one half the night /
of the shortest winter day /
and wrap it in your arms”.
These lines “burn with magic” as Vorhees waves his wand over the paper, over his lovers, to conjure words that bring these lovers to us, before us, for us, as he begs:
“Take me in … take me in”, while making “the moon turn the tides into whales against glittery crystal chandelier yachts”. 
With this chapter it’s obvious to understand that Vorhees “rose out of the nursery and went to conquer Love” and knows how to translate his victory into poetry lines that are pages of unexpected moisture “running across your face” and “lying between your thighs” and are “devoted to the many aspects of romantic (and sometimes anti-romantic) relationships”.
Weighing in at sixty-four pages and forty-forty poems, this collection is a heavyweight in love, passion, yearning, and loss, as the poet takes his readers through the many stages of his “appetite and whims” and “the secret vacuum” of his heart that “no intruder can penetrate”, where he howls for his women and their “exclusive delights” and “breaths of lovers with joys unmatched”, as Duane Vorhees professes: “I hand-n-knees my way inside where moist warmth is / plentiful”.   
Dah
======================================================
Dah’s seventh poetry collection is Something Else’s Thoughts (Transcendent Zero Press) and his poems have been published by editors from the US, UK, Ireland, Canada, Spain, Singapore, Philippines, Poland, Australia, Africa, and India. He is a Pushcart Prize and Best Of The Net nominee and the lead editor of the poetry critique group, The Lounge. Dah's eighth book is forthcoming in November 2018 from Flutter Press. www.dahlusion.wordpress.com


Duane Vorhees
Vorhees’ Bio:

Dr. Duane Vorhees taught in Korea and Japan for over 1/4 of a century before retiring. Now he lives in the US, where he is writing and maintaining a daily e-zine devoted to the creative arts, duanespoetree.blogspot.com


Poems by Dah

Dah

To Fill This Page

To fill this page
I must empty my doubt,
holding fast to the joy
of ambition.

A meditation: Creation is a revelation
expanding in silence.
What brought us to earth?
What binds us to the promise of language?

With words liberating this poem,
each phrase is an abundance of sounds.
I admire the power of verbs
and make a wish: to sail upon the silence of light.

Light streams into our veins
like cosmic opium
or like lovers who live
for being inside each other.

Sometimes I demand too much
from the universe
and speaking of this is like an iron trap
suffering from rust.
I write this down
so as not to fill my feelings
with emptiness. Soul:

my bliss, my enthusiast
— I must speak of this
to understand these burning lines.


I Promise To Imagine

I promise to imagine
and wish for sentences
chosen by love:

together we’ll undress
my words
and unfasten my attachments.

Emptiness: leave me alone
I will not surrender to blind faith.

Earth breathes fear
and most of humankind
is uncertain of commandments
in writing.

I shuffle my verbs, adverbs, contractions,
looking for instant gratification.

Disappointment:
serious laughter,
like splinters in my throat.

I want to beg earth for forgiveness and
I am embarrassed for not knowing how.

Human kindness needs encouragement,
still our destruction will not be postponed.

How do we explain
to our children’s children
about the darkness we are conjuring for them?


Twilight Is A Sudden Sadness

Who am I to know
the existence of heaven
lives in the pause between breaths
or the story of creation
is a searing scar in the side of Jesus?

I have collected my pleasures,
like monsoons collect the dead,
have collected memories,
the raw force of vitality,

the swift silk of a spider’s web,
the emptiness of being, all of this,
a country of vibrant emotions.

I have touched the sea with my hands,
bringing them together, feeling
the abrupt salt between my fingers,
torrid like the stinging whip of a lover:

Her tongue burns me alive
with its naked wine,
her eyes dig into the depths of mine.

Who am I to know that the Kingdom of God
lives in the stones, fire, water, mud,
or that twilight is a sudden sadness
like blood clots caused by thorns?

Still, my excitement is a tower of energy
a vigorous burst of sperm
or the moonlight’s mysteries fitting its key
into my soul where a secret stillness

wallows in swaggering bliss.
I have tasted the meat of the universe,
its heart, lungs, and liver, tasting it
with my gentleness, a gentleness like
soft lips, or a feather, or a lover’s whisper:
Her mouth burns me alive
with its raw juice, her heart feeds from mine.


Who am I to know that the Supreme Spirit
lives in the flies, the lice, the grub, or that
death’s bitter sorrow lives in the dust, the bones,
the ash, or in the agony of a broken heart?

 — once, Jesus summoned me. He undid
his wounds with the jagged blades of my
tears. I held him, embracing him, saying:

My brother, my brother, my peaceful brother …
who am I … to know …
who I am?


A Shawl Of Indigo Aura

The evening is a thick, black lid
closing over the sun.
Tonight, the sky is inlaid
with pink clouds

because the light has crawled
inside of them, falling asleep.
How is it
I understand light’s recital

yet have no words
to explain it?
A poem without words
a poet without voice.

Today I watched a child,
a young girl, my daughter,
step into a puddle of light.
She said: I have sailed here before.

Her breath is the weight of a sparrow.
Her eyes, like poetry itself.
She wears a shawl of indigo aura
and gives me armfuls of her enthusiastic love.

My seven-year-old daughter with a plum tree stick
in her hand saving earth worms from drowning

— winter storms have destroyed their homes
her enthusiastic love was saving them:

bellies down, she placed the exhausted worms
in the grass, quietly talking to them.
To the dead ones she whispered:
I love you and have a wonderful afterlife.

Of the darkness: together we whispered about
light falling asleep.


The Glazed Elixir Of A French Kiss

The spirited light, solar-like wind,
breath with its passion, the sun’s copious
erotic venom.

I speak of everything and all things
without caution: this noise inside my head,
layers of high pitched harmonics,

the compressed hours between
birth and death, the heart’s heat
ascending and descending,

the end always beginning and again
your Gothic eyes. I have been here
and there, a prodigal hawk

with the flavor of blood-kisses hovering
like steam or mist or a weapon stirring
the body’s carbonic magnetic motion.

Never the sky always the silence disclosing
the stillness in death’s fantasy — life and death,
love and loss, a fatalistic dream-reel

as if two mirrors facing each other reflecting
a vacant image. I remember a faint trail
of finger prints. My impatient pulse

raced into yours: deserted passions,
like roses, each one dies the same way
— our emotions mumbled

through love and into the glazed elixir
of a French kiss: In my arms you had fallen asleep
not knowing I had left.

Dah

Dah’s seventh poetry collection is Something Else’s Thoughts (Transcendent Zero Press) and his poems have been published by editors from the US, UK, Ireland, Canada, Spain, Singapore, Philippines, Poland, Australia, Africa, and India. He is a Pushcart Prize and Best Of The Net nominee and the lead editor of the poetry critique group, The Lounge. Dah's eighth book is forthcoming in November 2018 from Flutter Press.

www.dahlusion.wordpress.com