Showing posts with label Freedom 2022. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Freedom 2022. Show all posts

Guest Editorial: John Maurer

John Maurer
Clearly, the meaning of freedom has evolved, and continues to evolve. We live in a time when the meaning of freedom, or democratic freedom, must be considered not only in national terms, but in global terms as well. Freedom must be considered as more than simply the basic state of not being imprisoned. Understanding freedom requires us to elevate the concept beyond autonomy to include the right to a voice and the right for that voice to be heard. We are beginning to recognize that freedom isn’t something endowed entirely upon everyone equally, even in democratic societies. It is more complex than just a law or a system of government. Laws can be written, but that doesn’t mean they are always upheld, let alone enforced without bias. And in places where everyone has the right to vote, not everyone has the same access to the polls. At a time when so much divides us, even our interpretations of the democratic system pull us apart. Some claim that anarchy is the only true freedom. Others would say a direct democracy, such as that in ancient Athens, is the truest form of democracy and freedom. While others prefer the American model of a republic in which elected officials vote on behalf of their constituents.

While India celebrates its 75th birthday and year of independence this very month, Ukraine is simultaneously fighting to maintain its democratic freedom in the Russo-Ukrainian War. We are at a global crossroads where we can see both the beauty of a blooming democracy and the resilience of another that is under attack and threatened with a loss of freedom. Where India achieved its freedom through peaceful protests directed at the British Empire, Ukraine has been forced to defend its freedom by repelling a Russian invasion. We are seeing the different circumstances where freedoms are withheld or threatened, as well as seeing the different ways that different groups of people respond, or are forced to respond, to these threats. We’ve come to see that freedom is delicate, fragile, and precarious; that the places where democratic freedom exists are places where people have had to fight for it, in one way or another, in more and more instances. 

More than all of this, freedom extends well beyond just the political construct. It is a multi-faceted word that means different things to almost everyone. Some search for psychological freedom, to be free of worry or anxiety or other thoughts that restrain them. Others search for financial freedom to rescue them from the monotony of their daily lives, from their jobs, household chores, and worry for the future. Everyone has things in their life that they feel are holding them back, bad habits or being too busy or a lack of resources, financial or other; but everyone is searching for greater freedom within society, within themselves, and within our governments. Though our interpretations may differ, we all share in the desire for autonomy and freedom.

In this issue, the editors of Setu and I wanted to bring together poetry, prose, and visual art that spoke to all these facets of freedom, and perhaps others as well. I’ve curated a collection of writing and art from a diverse set of artists and writers; old and young, experienced and amateur, from a variety of countries, and with a variety of perspectives.  Though all these artists and writers are from different backgrounds and have had very different life experiences, you will likely find that their ideas of freedom are far more similar than they are different. Though we may have different ideas of how to get there, we all are headed for the same destination, to a place of greater freedom for ourselves and others.

It has been a privilege and an honor to have had so many writers and artists share their work with me, as well as having the opportunity to guest edit this issue on a topic that is near and dear to my heart. 

“Freedom, in any case, is only possible by constantly struggling for it.”—Albert Einstein

John Maurer
Guest Editor, SETU, August 2022, Special Edition on Freedom

Bio: John Maurer is a 27-year-old writer from Pittsburgh that writes fiction, poetry, and everything in-between, but their work always strives to portray that what is true is beautiful. When not writing, they enjoy spending their time playing basketball, making music, and taking long contemplative walks through the woods. They have been previously published in Setu Bilingual, The Bitchin’ Kitsch, Thought Catalog, and more than a hundred others. @JohnPMaurer (johnpmaurer.com)

Special Edition: Freedom
Featured Authors

1. Jass Aujla
2. Pallavi Baruah
3. Don Carpenter
4. Alice Chains
5. PS Conway
6. Kellasandra Ferrara
7. David Garcia
8. Athena Kaiman
9. Sasha Lauren
10. Frances MacGregor
11. George Miller
12. Maria Perez
13. Giselle Phillips
14. Steven Ross
15. Crow Rudd
16. J.A. Savage
17. Angela Thompson
18. Samra WaHeed
19. Antonia Wang
20. Cassondra Windwalker



Creative Collaborations: Paul Brookes and Jerome Berglund

Exposition

 

The notion of acclaimed English poet Paul Brookes—who had  been interviewed in Setu—and myself putting our heads together through a collaborative process, to produce something blending our somewhat contrasting styles had been suggested to us by this journal’s wonderful, accomplished English editor—consummate, innovative proponent of conversation and dialogue in the arts, multilingual world-traveler himself, who publishes from India to Canada— Dr. Sunil Sharma initially. 

 

Paul is a masterful, quite original haikuist, and I have also found great satisfaction and fulfillment exploring the rich tradition of economical literary snapshots, and their (most common) proverbial configurations of dual images juxtaposed.  But while we both possessed some passing exposure and immense appreciation for the larger practice (including those seminal renga) from which the historical hokku was first derived, broke loose so to speak, and were extracted as individual set-pieces, neither of us had as yet experimented with the fusion cuisines blending these lasers of concrete meaning could be combined toward giving rise to and strikingly achieving between several participants working in concert. 

 

Coincidentally, a very modern and sophisticated approach and technique for effecting such a collusion had just been wonderfully expounded upon at length in one of the latest issues of Frogpond, the official journal of the Haiku Society of America (a subscription to which is included with the very reasonable annual membership dues), and that fantastic article provided step-by-step instructions and made the practice so enticing that upon reading it an aspiring haijin like myself invariably becomes highly inspired to attempt at the first opportunity. 

 

Thankfully Paul was extremely kind and generous, and expressed the utmost interest and enthusiasm for delving into something new outside both our comfort zones (“Love collaborating. Love learning new skills. Love working with folk that expand my own horizons…” he informed me commendably) so we immediately set about following the directions and prescriptions on how to fruitfully intermingle our Midwestern and Albion voices and sensibilities into jarring, provocative synthesis. 

 

We began by determining two pieces each which seemed particularly suited for this process, having strong, discrete, somewhat contained lines and breaks which might conceivably stand-alone segmented.  Our partner then provided two additional micro poems to be inserted into the gaps which arose when we allowed space between them for cooperation and solidarity. Within the first two lines and following the final one of the segmented foundations these two new additions were positioned. American readers might find a fitting analogue for the cross-sectioned sequence in those three buns of a customary Big Mac hamburger from McDonald’s.

 

After the collaborator added his two poetic responses to the original construction, the spinal column’s author contributed its final central heart of the sequence at the end, approximating the meat patty for our sandwich analogy, pi├иce de resistance of sorts to anchor it, signed, sealed and delivered.  There are a few different approaches to the split, in certain circumstances they are done entirely by a single author, and others also prefer to have each of the inserted verses by the alternate party, which depending on objective can have its merits.  But you may note that in this most common and popular arrangement each writer contributes six lines total, there is an even weighting and ideally a beautiful balance realized between the two voices on display, creating arguably a perfect Hegelian dialectic tension, bringing to mind competing magnets, see-saws, the Cold War, yin-yang…

 

Finally, we generated fitting titles with the intention—in a function not dissimilar to their applications via haibun or rengay—of their helping situate each work in its desired context of bondage and limitation, spatial or class, mental as much as relational, physical and metaphoric.  I’m enormously grateful to Paul for so magnanimously suffering the six-hour time differences from Minneapolis over the pond to where he resides while working together with me, lending his inimitable spark and potent original edge to these works. Each of us being of a contrarian bent, admittedly somewhat unconventional in our own fashions and methodologies, these may well represent haiku[1] splitting unlike any you shall encounter anytime soon, I hope you won’t hold that against us too harshly! Thank you for reading, would love to hear your thoughts on our barmy escapades... :D

 

--- Jerome Berglund, Minneapolis MN

 

 

Collaborative Practice:

 


Quarters

 

---Paul Brookes and Jerome Berglund

 

parlor room

 

Wooden serviette 

rings, from Woolworths kept special,

white linen napkins.

 

undercover maid is revealed

 

bowing under

weight seems to leer

arctic shelf

 

...if it weren't for you meddling kids!

 

dead ones dull

Yorkshire Stone cannot match the flashy 

posh shiny granite

 

 

 

 

Chicken Wire

 

---Paul Brookes and Jerome Berglund

 

these millennials not having children...

 

root, rot, pit support 

steel arches - the Drift darkness

often stared into mute

 

master forces captives 

 

Llewyn Davis 

takes requests 

sitting for da Vinci

 

to multiply 

 

once much clank, heat, scrape 

busy dust there is left gust 

heat slow dust turn light

 

 

 

 

Bird Rescue

 

---Jerome Berglund and Paul Brookes

 

All cages free caged. 

 

ladybug

is not moving

chipped nail

 

Release imagination.

 

lamp helps avoid trip 

on railway tracks, see roof yawn 

cathedral crumble

 

Chains chafe, break blood out.

 

Walgreens lot

man approaches car window

mismatched shoes

 

Fish Tank

 

---Jerome Berglund and Paul Brookes

 

poison in veins frees

 

lonely blonde

balcony scene

torches doth teach

 

skin to need more poison pain

 

Nowhere to go dream 

dependent. Free to roam, to contemplate.

Locked into four walls.

 

skewers a ladder

 

climbing this staircase 

time and time again knees cry out

Escher

Cassondra Windwalker (Freedom 2022)

Cassondra Windwalker
revolt

the ravens are all dead

the salmon choke out
on rocks at the ocean mouth

and the tide has cast off
the tug of the moon

no? no.

it is only one more skull
piled outside the city gates,
only one more feast to fill
the bellies of the fat,
only one more lie told as truth
to wax-filled ears

so, I will still pick among the carcasses,
make meat of misery, find food
for fury in the bodies of my brothers,
send sun-lit flames flashing
from ebony wings to the eyes of the blind

I will swim upstream, I will transform
from silent gray to crimson outrage,
I will plant my seed and glory
as its life consumes my own

I will turn to the moon
and say, drive me,
drive me against this sand

together let us mold
a new earth,
and alter all these shores.
***


Our Mother’s Children

I have forgotten their names,
she is muttering, her arms clasped
‘round her knees as she rocks herself
back and forth, and I must
lean in, strain to hear her
over the planes and the shouting
and the crumbling,
but I am grateful to pretend
this is more important, that her words
carry more weight than those bombs do – 

whose names? I ask,
and her eyes clutch mine, 
full of tears.
My children’s names, she says,
but she has no children.

likely neither of us
will ever have children,
likely neither of us
have more than a month, a week,
an hour of our own,
but now I too am crying,
rocking myself in empty arms like a babe:

we have all lost
we have all forgotten
the names of our children,
of our mother’s children

we heap graves upon them
we cannot mark.
***


April Eighth

away they would go,
and away they went

each clutching their scant hoard of self,
whatever that still comprised:
coats and hats and photographs
and ID cards and grandmother’s jewelry
and her son’s hand
and his daughter’s chubby little legs
slung over his shoulders

away they would go, 
and away they went

away from screaming sirens
and bombed-out buildings,
away from bodies in the streets
and torture in basements,
from torn throats and torn skirts

away they would go, 
and away they went

they were waiting on a train
that did not come,
in a graveyard where timetables stood crosses:
their tickets punched,
their journey ended.

away they would go, 
and away they went.
***


Bio: Cassondra Windwalker is a poet, essayist, and novelist presently writing full-time from the southern Alaskan coast. Her novels and full-length poetry collections are available in bookstores and online. She enjoys interacting with readers and generally decent human beings on Twitter @WindwalkerWrite.

Antonia Wang (Freedom 2022)

Antonia Wang 
Broken Radar

Every bloom is a feast to the hungry bees.
They don’t mind that we haul them
to the almond fields.
Every flower gets a kiss.

Latitude is not freedom
without nectar.

Words revolt against a thought
unwinding from unknown spools,
the broken radar beats
a borrowed compass.

Who will survey the haunted forest
if not the lost,
the ones who can see the riddles
in the falling mist
and hear the clarion calls of wings
that will someday become extinct?
***


Only for a Breath

Silence shudders before the wind. 
My pores stand in attention
to the waking beat.

I took pictures of a ram
settling disputes for the drove. He is still
a sheep.

But I am ether, grass and sea—
a fractal of a mountain
in the amalgamated ridge,

a complete tomorrow
when the moment still exists.
I am dispersed and collected,

in uncompromising dawns
that fade and last as long as I live.
I am free.
***

 
Southern Home

This home creeps around me a mile a minute.
It covers my face until I morph
into the Earth Goddess (with an outstretched hand,
spewing water).

It bears roots before it chokes me
between the windows and misgivings.
I trip on the encroaching vines
and touch can feel like cuffs on breathless mornings.

It once smelled like joy, so I jellied 
racemes of blossoms. I pickled the leaves,
made soup with the oblong roots
for as long as my hands could move.

Paralysis. I can’t see the sun. The green 
in my irises has dulled and winter is hopes away.
By then, I’ll be gone. I’ll be a wisp, 
an apparition, a Southern ghost.
***


Bio: Antonia Wang is a foodie, poet, and yogi born in the Dominican Republic. She is the author of Love Bites, In the Posh Cocoon, Hindsight 2020, Retrospectiva 2020, and Palette. Her poetry has been featured in various literary magazines and anthologies. She writes in English and Spanish and lives in the United States. Connect with her on social media @tuttysan.

Samra WaHeed (Freedom 2022)

* 1 *

Today’s freedom
A series of letting go
Of your mind
Your programming
Your past
The parts of you that you thought were you but aren’t
Things you thought made you that hold you back
The moments of meaning
Ones you made in situations that did not exist
Except in your mind’s desperate attempt to be chosen
Shed your skin
Time and again
Leave the wreckage of your previous life
Where you made yourself small
And sat in dark corners to be forgotten, never missed
Your cloak of shame does not fit anymore
Shine Polaris 
You guide ships still finding their way
***

* 2 *

I bought my freedom in exchange for years of bleeding 
Broken at an early age
My father, ever a distant stranger in his chair
My mother a ghost
Later replaced, a skin filled in psychosis
Father filled his cup to forget
It worked well, he forgot us
But I could never forget that cup
I despised it
The smell sickened me
I did not always know what it held
But I knew it made me sad
And how I felt it needed to be washed differently than others
More slowly, with gentle hands, in my tears
This is the cup that made him talk to me like I had words
Even after his passing, his cup is my prison
Decades later
Still chipped in the same places
***


* 3 *

Free me to love and let love be… In all that is my essence
Let it reach from my toes and grow
Through the roots of my hair to its curled tips
Allow me to breathe in love and let it ripple out of my center
A deep indigo
In the stillness that holds tranquil the moon, in midnight sky 
Fast, at the opening of day
Through to Evening’s embrace, on the back of Wind’s quiet chill
Where does my skin find humility and warmth to unburden itself
In the need for a sway, safe against insecurities, like bare trees in Autumn’s breath
My leaves are gone but I am still here
Waiting for Winter’s White to dress me in the cloth of cleanliness
Cloaked in beauty
***



untitled photo and painting by Samra WaHeed

Bio: Samra WaHeed is a dedicated elementary educator who enjoys teaching writing among other subjects. She completed a master’s degree in her field, focusing on equitable instruction. Samra began writing poetry in 2009 after making a life changing decision. Samra draws inspiration from her experiences and the beauty she finds in nature. She loves hiking, conversations and coffee, and music. For Samra, writing has been a space for self-expression and healing.

Angela Thompson (Freedom 2022)

Angela Thompson
Victors

You’re above everything    
momentarily     
leaning into your 
New Laws, imposing 
monetarily on    
preoccupied pawns 
upholding promise         
carefully versing  
considering your  

Cruel self-confidence   
how your fervent sect  
produces your cold,  
zealous negligence  

wields unseen weapons 
upon workers and 
children: how dare you 
now descend on
communities—times
you created.    
***


Diverted Potential

Days open like blooms 
while no clouds overcast 
plans: set dreams, seeds 
when whetted rise aspiration  
but give way, dampened 
by forceful assertion 
wielding passionate disregard 
as if saving grace weren’t 
mercy— kindness of humanity
which humbly extends 
hands to meet need 
without cajoling.
***


Free Play: Last Decades

snuck cigarettes taste     
laughter inside cracked windows
fallen leaves crackle

under hidden feet 
twenty inches from our chins
outside, feeling cold 

below windowsill 
flatware clanging, dinner smells 
like winter coming 

time, figments passing  
twenty years plus ten  
autumn has arrived 
***

Bio: Angela is an experienced freelance writer and editor from the United States. Presentation, perception, and language drive her professional and creative works, the latter which seek to encourage enthusiasm for nature, diversity, and acceptance. She resides in the Southwestern U.S. with her marriage partner, where they dream of travels after retirement.
Ms. Thompson can be reached via direct message @CaTxAng

j.a. savage (Freedom 2022)

j.a. savage
1-23

There's no way you could imagine
There's no way you could see
What you would do when the prison doors flew open
And you were told you were finally free
 
When you walked out into the blinding light 
The time was one twenty-three
The transport you were promised was nowhere in sight
So, you found shade beneath the limbs of a skeleton tree
 
The streets and the town square were empty 
There was no life anywhere to be seen 
On the prison walls someone scrawled 'Satan please tempt me' 
And you thought By God I know what that means ...
 
The evil that you do will find you out they say
If not tomorrow or next year then sooner than someday
of that you should be sure and have no doubt
Best secrets are best kept, don't retrace your steps or explain your whereabouts
 
When the sun disappeared and the night fell 
The chill it quickly set in
The gates and doors locked at the prison 
And you outside crying, begging to be let in
 
The hell of loneliness out there is worse than eternal or original sin
You rattled the gate and wept at your fate and begged again to be let in. 
***

A Home Again

You can't get where you want to go
Till you've left where you don't wanna be
I was born a long way from my home 
I couldn’t escape the chains of liberty
I was born in a strange and foreign land, I've had to cross a dozen seas 
finding my way back to the home 
Where I had never ever been
And set about searching for the family I had never seen.

They welcomed me with arms outstretched praised the earth I walked upon 
showered me with love and riches and begged me never to be gone

I had no reason to leave this place still my feet they itched to wander 
there were plenty other families out there to make my own in the next town or beyonder
 
I took care of them and all their needs were met
There was a lump in my throat for the home I left
It was bitter cold and I felt sad for a second
I kept my soiled gloves on, the wind called my name 
and the open road it beckoned
It would be warmer weather where I was going I reckoned
***

Hum Drumming
 
In the mighty jungle of watermarked stipulations
through the skinny walls of codes and regulations
they stepped lightly over fire and foreign relations
and dismantled, reassembled and listened in to our conversations
 
Their uniforms were neat and scrubbed and starched
and steam pressed 
they were armed with ideas they’d panel beaten and reprocessed 
watching us closely while we were getting dressed and undressed
And resistance was futile and so was protest
every scream of no was received and recorded as “Oh, Yes"
And hailstorms, burning heat, sleet and snow gave us no rest
 
Who was surprised, who amongst us couldn’t see it coming
Bullets flew, bombs went off and it was pointless running
the courageous fell, the brave and gentle as well and
the spoils went to the cunning 
 
We sang it’s all gone to hell 
there’s no ringing of bells
just the nearby groan of drones humming
 
We clicked Yes to agree to their terms and conditions 
subscribed distracted to the faithless suicide missions
our FAQ’s turned over into secrets and superstitions
And devices overruled and ruled over all our intuitions 
 
Beyond the mists and in the distance 
there are no drummers drumming, 
no joe strummers strumming
we sing it’s all gone to hell 
there’s no ringing of bells
just the nearby ongoing groan 
of drones humming
***


Bio: j.a. savage is a South African writer and poet who has had a long career as a
music publisher. He continues to work in the creative world and lives near
Utrecht in the Netherlands.

crow rudd (Freedom 2022)

crow rudd

they came for the poets

 

they came for the poets

and we did not speak out

for we did not know it was happening

the burmese junta had switched off the internet

and scraps of information

were barely making it

past the virtual blockade

 

they came for the poets

4 dead, over 30 imprisoned

and we did not speak out

for it did not make the headlines at the time

outside of a few fringe reporters

"though i have different views than you

i’ll lay down my life for you all"

k za win wrote

three weeks

before he did

 

they came for the poets

but khet thi made cake

ice-cream and poetry

before the violence of the military coup

robbed him of his future

“they shoot in the head

but they don’t know

revolution is in the heart”

these words spoken

at k za win’s funeral

before khet himself was arrested

and beaten to death

 

they came for the poets

but kyi lin aye was a teacher

beloved by her students

her blood type on her arm

her last wish

that her body be donated

to someone in need

instead, the junta

harvested the organs

of those it murdered

 

they came for the poets

in the place poetry has thrived

since ancient times

the place political poetry

has been stifled

unsuccessfully

since 1962

the place poets

have been beaten

arrested

and killed

for generations

and the west does not blink

because poetry is the weapon

to unseat tyrants

and we are full of them

 

they came for the poets

and we are speaking out

because the most beautiful souls

are lost in the harshest of ways

and they must always

be

remembered

***

 


 

apanthropy

 

there are times i want the numbness to take me again

to go back to my late teens

when we drowned our emotions

in ethanol and smoke

crushed pills and resin

and the mouths of everyone

too numb to care about us

 

i didn't care either

this is just how we passed the time

between friends getting sectioned

or driven to a&e

swallowing charcoal

and contraceptives

to make sure those nights didn't linger

our apathy would do the rest

 

time becomes a little unglued

when you don’t plan on sticking around

i think a year passed before i clocked

glances in the classroom

and it took another year to care

for the looks i was getting at home

unanswered questions about nights spent

under the bridge around the corner

spending whatever money i could get

at the one corner shop that didn’t ask for id

 

there are times i wish i could surrender

throw my arms out and trust fall back into oblivion

take the bumps and scrapes

harsh words and harsher fists

only to forget what the fight was about

share a bottle of the strongest stuff we could find

those wounds would reopen

only after we'd drank each other dry

it never really mattered

not like any of us had a plan

outside of who you'd bum your next cig off

 

there are times i wish i didn't have to feel everything

that the drugs had done their job

and stripped the burden of feeling

off this cage of flesh and worry

emotions permanently dialed to 11

the knob on the amp snapped off

grungy off-key notes strummed

on a hand-me-down guitar

followed by echoing shouts to turn it off

i wish i could turn it off

 

there are times i wish i could reset

play the last few levels over again

i’d set new checkpoints

make sure to save my game more often

take power-ups over debuffs

and find more confidence for the boss battles

i lost this game

and i’ll have to live with that

but the sequel is coming out soon

and i’ve got a new strategy

all cooked up

it’s time to win for once

***

 

 

little pigeons

 

"i always thought doves

were a strange choice

for a symbol of peace"

i hear from my hairdresser

mid trim

one wet thursday afternoon

 

i should preface this with the fact that

my mum cuts my hair

maybe once a year

she was a ‘proper’ hairdresser

before she had my sister

 

i remember spending an hour or two

there after school most days

if i didn't visit wendy

the wonky old donkey

down on the beach

 

i was impromptu entertainment

for the women

who were monthly

or even weekly regulars

with stories about playground dramas

and how i did on my maths test

while she busied herself

tidying the grey curls that hadn't changed

in over a decade

 

and how they'd chat

about the weather

their knitting groups

and how they'd rather come here

than the homes they

waited in

 

they never phrased it like that

but it was always the vibe i got

i never got the nerve to ask

what for

***

 

 

marvel movies

my father is a blank photo album and a strong dislike for the smell of weed

he left me with a face i cannot love and a distrust for authority figures

i set fire to my first relationship at the age of 16 because i thought that's how it worked

i thought that's how men acted

i am not a man anymore

the idea became so repulsive that instead of unlearning these behaviours

i shed the weighted vest of expectations and dropped it into the sea

and then i set the sea on fire

 

now it just makes me angry

every hard line on my figure feels like a failure

every macho bone in my body bends against the softness i wish i inhabited

the roughness of my voice is the villain of victims' nightmares

if i could wrench out my voice box and still be a competent poet i wouldn't think twice about it

even my emotions are an edict to an edifice i want no part of

the only thing i can claim as mine is a heart

far too eager to sandpaper scrape against old memories until it's ragged

 

now i watch time disappear like it's afraid of me

i am told that women find me intimidating

that trans people taking space is a bad thing

and we all know men have been dangerous for decades

so i wear dungarees with dinosaurs on them

i avoid the gym and too much exercise

and try to convince everyone that i am not a threat

that my darkest secret is that i just want to be loved

try to convince myself that these echoes don't define me

the kind of echoes that create bruised ribs and split lips

the kind that gave my mother bruised ribs and split lips

but i am not my father

i am not my father

i know i am not my father

 

but i am trying to teach myself not to follow in footsteps i cannot see

try stepping out of a shadow in the middle of the night

as a teen i filled notebooks with reasons for why i shouldn't stay

i was righteous in my belief that one quick fix would solve everything

i could make it painless

 

but thor 4 came out for my birthday

and there's talk of a young avengers movie

and charlie cox is back as daredevil

and moon knight and blade and secret invasion and kang the conqueror and–

 

i am alive because of marvel movies

 

i am alive because of all the reasons i had to go

i told myself i could not leave until it's finished

i cannot leave until i know how the story ends

i cannot end this chapter while there is so much left to know

and eventually i realised

every day is one extra than i ever thought i'd get

every new experience is ecstasy because i am here to see it

every new friend

every trip to distant cities

every new favourite food

every poignant moment between partners

every kiss and kind word and

every

marvel

movie

 

it's ok if the reason you haven't killed yourself yet is a small one

sometimes it's all you need

i am alive because of marvel movies

and a desire to prove myself wrong

***


Bio: Crow Rudd (they/them) is a disabled nonbinary queer internationally published punk poet, multiple slam champion, events producer and workshop facilitator based in York. Their work focuses on the ideas of mental illness, queerness, activism, grief, identity, queer love and the importance of cuddles. Creator and host of Sad Poets Doorstep Club, founder of the UK Trans & Nonbinary Poets Network and workshop facilitator for They//Us, Crow has been published by Slice of the Moon Books, Paper & Ink Literary Zine and Warning Lines, has featured at Manchester Punk Festival, Loud & Queer Arts Festival and Leeds LGBT+ Lit Fest, and has headlined Punk in Drublic, Switchblade and Incite!, among others.

 

Their debut collection ’i am a thing of rough edges’ is available from Whisky & Beards Publishing.